A good friend asked me two questions about church planting last week. The first question he asked me, “What is the biggest thing you’ve learned?” The second one, “What’s the biggest issue you’ve faced while church planting?” He was quick to note that the two questions are not the same thing.
While I didn’t have to think very hard about the first question, the second one took me a second. Not because I didn’t know the answer.
I just didn’t like the answer.
The single biggest issue I face as a church planter? Me. Myself. I. My own sin-sick heart.
I know I’m supposed to be all holy and Jesus-y but, I’m pretty much just a busted up, run of the mill sinner. Imperfect and broken, desperately clinging to grace and mercy, every single moment of the day. I put up a good front, people probably think I’m a pretty “righteous dude”, but when they get to know me, they realize how mistaken they were.
One of my favorite things about social media is the ability to keep up with friends. I can scan through the feeds and see how amazing their lives are. Especially some of my friends who are church planting too. They used a model called, “launch large”. They spent gobs of money on advertising, they worked their fingers to the bone passing fliers out to thousands of people, they put up those little signs everywhere. They rented cool space. They found a ridiculously cool band. They have sets on their stage that leave me slack-jawed. Overnight it seems they have hundreds of people showing up to hear them preach.
Do I celebrate and respond with great joy? Nope. I am green with envy.
That’s right, I am jealous. Oh, I hide it with critiques of form, missiology, and practice. But, at the root of it, I am so jealous.
When the jealousy hits, when the envy rises up, it makes me question everything that I’ve done over the last two years. Doubt grows in me like a weed. I wonder if we’ve been doing it all wrong. Maybe we should have rented cool space, spent lots of cash on ads, found a cool band, and put on the best worship service in town?
The envy leads to doubt and the doubt leads to fear. Have we missed it? Are we failing? Have I led these crazy people who said, “I’m in!” down a dead end? Can we make it? Will we be poor? Am I failing my family? Will I provide for my wife and kids?
You see, I’m the biggest issue I face a church planter. My sinful heart. My lack of faith. My unwillingness to trust. These are the battles that have to be fought and won on a daily basis.
The post The Biggest Issue appeared first on The Journal by Daniel M. Rose. It was written by Daniel M. Rose.
from WordPress http://ift.tt/1DxFcjL
via IFTTT
0 comments:
Post a Comment