>Are you comfortable?

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When I was in the hospital giving birth to Michael I was bouncing around on the bed a lot. My doctor asked me, What are you doing? I said, I am trying to get comfortable. He responded, with the wisdom of Solomon, You won't be comfortable until it is over. That truth applies to a lot more than childbirth...

Posted by Robin Schmidt on July 7th, 2009

I had a rough week last week. Maybe you heard. Larry and I were talking it over last night and between our parents and our kids there was some very hard stuff. Decisions were made and implemented. Reflecting on it last night I realized everything was going great, so why did I feel like crap?

This morning somewhere between waking and sleeping, dreaming and praying I grasped on to something and I'm trying to hold on tight, but it's a little like holding smoke.

What does it take to rock your faith? A job loss? Illness? We were talking about this the other night. What shakes our faith? What causes us to say, "I believe, help my unbelief"?

I love people, who according to my understanding if they died right now, they would be separated from God eternally. Loved ones going to hell, that's what rocks me.

Here's the trouble with reading about other people's stories in the Bible: we get to see the ending. In just a few pages, maybe even just a few verses, the end of the story comes. Job's suffering is over, everything is restored, over and above.

This is almost worse than TV, where every problem is resolved within 30 to 60 minutes.

As a woman I have quickly recognized that some of the middle stuff is being left out of the Bible. We are not reading in "real" time. When you read, "and Leah begot Reuben" let me assure you there is a lot more to it than the word "begot". Am I right Moms?

So this morning when I was praying, I began drifting into sleep and dreaming. But my dream was very realistic, which is unusual for me. I was with Larry and Allison at a restaurant for some end of the year graduation swim recognition banquet type event. But we got a phone call and I had to drive home.

Driving home I was alone and it was quiet, the best time to think about this kind of stuff and I realized that I want to know the end of the story, now. NOW, before the end. I will be able to relax and enjoy life if I know everything is going to turn out the way I hope it will.

I can take time and look back over Job's story and glean truth from it, knowing it's all going to be right in the end.

Job didn't have that advantage. Job had no idea how it was going to end, if it was going to end, or why it had all gone so bad in the first place.

And in my dream I was thinking about how I know God is sovereign and has the right to do what he wills. I believe that it is his right to save or condemn anyone I love. We all deserve condemnation.

But here I am knowing these people, loving them and wanting the very best for them. I want them to know God and be redeemed and restored. And I can't make that happen. So I wait and watch and hope and pray that that is the will of God.

But I want to know. Now.

In my dream I grasped on to something that I am trying to hold on to, but I feel it slipping away the more awake I become.

In my dream I came to the conclusion that better than knowing the end of the story, better than knowing the particular outcomes, better than that is knowing God. Knowing God better and better and better, so that in the end what I will want most is what he wills. Knowing God better every moment so that in the end I will want what he wills.

I can't know the end of the story right now. I am not particularly comfortable with my life right now. And I can't live in my dream, where driving down a very realistic street, I discovered that best thing I can seek after, the best thing I can want is not the "happy ending" but God himself.

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>The Power of Apology

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Posted by Robin Schmidt on June 23rd, 2009

Have you ever been hurt? It is usually the people closest to us that hurt us.

Is it ever easy to ask someone's forgiveness? Is it ever easy to say, I was wrong, I am sorry, please forgive me?

It may be even harder to grant forgiveness.

Growing up I can't remember my father ever saying he was sorry. We talked about that many years ago. I shared a specific memory about an incident that took place when I was 14. It began with me hurting my dad and then him not speaking to me. I said I was sorry and he wouldn't speak. What made an impression on a 14 year old, didn't stay with a 30something. My father said he didn't remember that event. But, he said, it sounded like him. Then he said,

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Two words. Spoken decades after the event, yet I could feel the hurt melting away. I could FEEL it. And now when I remember that event, the sting is gone.

I think that is what we call redemption. And forgiveness is a part of it.

Forgiveness is so important. To seek it, to give it. However hard it might be, it is so very important.

I have done some reading about dementia. It has hit close to home and so I have tried to understand what is happening, what has robbed me of someone I love.

Dementia refers to many symptoms/diseases describing various malfunctioning of the brain. Someone affected by dementia may not be able to retrieve information, or memories. They may not be able to connect faces and names and people. Someone with dementia is lost within their own brain. But there is one part of the brain that dementia does not touch.

Dementia does not injure the part of the brain that stores our emotions. No matter what else we lose, we will be able to recall emotions.

Emotions like anger.

I told a friend the other day that I fear dementia. I don't want to be trapped in my brain. I don't want to be trapped in my negative emotions. I don't want to store up a bunch of anger and then be trapped in it.

I don't know what the future holds for me. Maybe I will suffer from Alzheimer's. Maybe I will suffer from "hardening of the arteries". Maybe I will remain as lucid as I am today. I can neither predict nor control what happens.

I can, however, choose to follow Jesus. I can choose to humble myself and ask forgiveness when I wrong someone.

And when I am hurt, I can choose to forgive. I can choose to let Jesus redeem my past, my mistakes, my emotions.

Forgiveness may be hard, seeking it, giving it. But living with unforgiveness looks a lot like hell.

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Urban Exile: Gran Torino

I read this article this morning because I am always interested to see what people have to say about Michigan and Detroit.  Usually it's some sort of comedic piece or a good chuckle at the ineptitude of the city's political structure.  However, this morning when I read this Out of Ur post on Gran Torino I was moved.

You see, it's not everyday that you see a snapshot of Detrtoit that points to the racial and the spiritual. But, here we do. I have worked in and around the city of Detroit for four years. My first three and a half took place on the college campuses and for the last six months I have been in the suburbs working at Grace Chapel, EPC.  In my time here I have been amazed by what is happening in and around our city.

Many people look at 8 Mile and Telegraph, those grand dividers as the keys to what's going on here.  The reality is that they aren't.  There is a movement growing of the emerging generation to re-engage in a real way the very real problems that our city faces.  They see the problems.  They live the problems.  Yet, when you go to Wayne State University or talk to people from Citadel (a multi-ethnic church in the heart of the city) you begin to glimpse a different picture: hope.

Whereas our parents generation was one "lost in space", our generation is one that seeks to rectify those problems and change the future. Are we despairing? Yes. Are we frustrated with an institutional agenda that makes change difficult? Yes. Are we without hope? No.

As I think about what David Swanson says in his article I can't help but think that this is the generation that will change the tide. We can only hope.

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>The Road Not There

>Robert Frost took the road less traveled, and it made all the difference. But what about when the choice is not between two roads, but moving forward where there is no path at all?

Posted by Robin Schmidt on June 11th, 2009

We are the "sandwich" generation. Sandwiched between the needs of our parents and our children. I am feeling it. If I am feeling anything. Sometimes the feelings are hard to identify. Sometimes the path is more so.

What is the line between free will and predestination? Doug tackled this tough question a few weeks back. We do have choices to make, and they will have consequences and we are not sovereign and we cannot control those consequences. Those ideas and realities and ramifications are complex enough, however, it is not that simple.

No, it is not as simple as my choices. I stand connected to others and we all have choices. And our choices impact each other.

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth."

If only I could find that yellow wood where there are two roads. I wish! I stand at the beginning of woods and there is no path at all. Alongside me are family members, also about to embark on travel through the woods. And though we will travel together as much as possible, we are not traveling as a group; there is no leader and no consensus.

I know others who have traveled these woods. Some seem as lost as I. Some are deep into the woods and have tales to share. But no two travelers adventures are near enough each other that a path begins to develop. No path. No road.

So here we go. I think I see a way that may prove passable. But no one will follow. In fact, I am waved off and confidently, recklessly, the journey is begun in a whole different direction.

But wait! I shout, I see some hazards ahead and we should prepare. This falls on deaf ears and on they plow with speed and haste and no thought to what lies ahead.

A creek appears and in we fall, we're now wet and soaked right through. But we don't stop, no on we go and picking up the pace. Next I see a place where the ground will fall away. Look there, I say, we should consider how best to traverse what is next.

Oh sure, is the answer, let us take care that we do not get wet again. But water was the last obstacle, not the next, and now we are preparing for what has passed. So when the ground begins its steep descent, we are not ready still, we could now meet a creek, but that has passed, so down we quickly fall.

I say, perhaps we could stop a bit and plan for what comes ahead. No time! Is the response. There is too much to do, all things in their own good time.

I pick myself up and stop and stare and wonder what are my options?

"I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:"
(No roads were there) in a wood, and I -
I took...

I took...

I took the hand of the One who made the woods,
and that has made all the difference.

(With apologies to Robert Frost, but sir, you left no map.)

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Connector Churches

I read this today and thought that the nine traits listed in Ed's book are really insightful.  What do you think?

http://blogs.lifeway.com/blog/edstetzer/

Creating Deeper Community
Churches that are effective at attracting and developing young adults place a high value on moving people into a healthy small group system. Young adults are trying to connect and will make a lasting connection wherever they can find belonging.

Making a Difference through Service

Churches that are transforming young adults value leading people to serve through volunteerism. More than being pampered, young adults want to be part of something bigger than themselves and are looking to be part of an organization where they can make a difference through acts of service.

Experiencing Worship

Churches that are engaging young adults are providing worship environments that reflect their culture while also revering and revealing God. More than looking for a good performance, young adults desire to connect with a vertical experience of worship.

Leveraging Technology

Churches that are reaching young adults are willing to communicate in a language of technology familiar to young adults. Young adults sense that these churches are welcoming churches that value and understand them, engaging them where they are.

Building Cross-Generational Relationships

Churches that are linking young adults with older, mature adults are challenging young adults to move on to maturity through friendship, wisdom, and support. Young adults are drawn to churches that believe in them enough to challenge them.

Moving Toward Authenticity

Churches that are engaging young adults are reaching them not only by their excellence but by their honesty. Young adults are looking for and connecting to churches where they see leaders that are authentic, transparent, and on a learning journey.

Leading by Transparency

Churches that are influencing young adults highly value an incarnational approach to ministry and leadership. This incarnational approach doesn't require revealing one's personal sin list so much as it does require that those in leadership must be willing to express a personal sense of humanity and vulnerability.

Leading by Team

Increasingly churches reaching young adults seem to be taking a team approach to ministry. They see ministry not as a solo venture but as a team sport--and the broader participation it creates increases the impact of ministry.

Is your church reaching young adults? If so, are any of these traits proving to me more instrumental than the others in your context?

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Baseball, Redemption, and a Hospital Room

A week ago yesterday my bride received a phone call. It was one of those calls that you dread. Her dad, Dennis, was in the hospital due to a stroke. It was "minor" but for a man like Dennis and for a family like ours it is major. Dennis is an athlete (at times becoming a scratch golfer!).  Dennis is the life of the party.  Dennis is the picture of the entrepreneurial spirit.  Dennis is the kind of man that other men want to be.  This is seen in the respect that his four son-in-laws have for him and the tender love that he bestows on his four daughters.

Amy left Detroit early last Thursday morning and drove (I am sure more quickly than she cares to admit) directly to the hospital room in Evansville, IN where Dennis was beginning his recovery.

But wait, that's not the whole backstory.

The beloved St. Louis Cardinals were about to finish their three game homestand against the hated Chicago Cubs.  The Cards had won the first two games of the series and were in position to sweep and return to first place in the division. In business like fashion they dispatched the Cubs and welcomed to town their cross state rivals, the Royals for a weekend set.

Every single day there was baseball. Every single day there was time spent in a hospital room. Every single daay there was a conversation over lunch or dinner that took place between Amy and Dennis about the Cards.

You see baseball was the beginning of healing. It was normalcy brought into an abnormal situation.  It was the pastoral balm that allowed father and daughter to sit and talk and be. Baseball. Not doctors. Not a golden tongued preacher. Not a good book. Baseball. It was the context.  The rhythm of life that never stops.  It's six on, one off created rhythm that touches us deep.

Some say the season is too long. Some say the games are too long. Some say it's boring. Some say it's day in and day out grind take away from it.

I could not disagree more. It is redemptive.  It is ongoing.  It is always with you. It provides passion, joy, pain, sorrow, elation. Most of all, it provides time.  Time for a father and daughter to be together.  Time for them to get lost together and forget that they are in a hospital room. Time for them to be transported to that place they both love.  That place where the buzz of the crowd, the warmth of the sun, and smell of the hot dog fill you.

Baseball.

Redemption.

A Hospital Room.

Beautiful.

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Scot McKnight on Spiritual Eroticism

Scot McKnight: Spiritual Eroticism | Out of Ur | Conversations for Ministry Leaders.

Above is a link to an article by Scot McKnight.  As I read it I was struck by how pointed the article was. Do we love Jesus, no really, do we love Jesus with the kind of love that requires us to be in his presence? Or are we satisfied with the idea of loving Jesus?

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